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Joke of the Day
"Got passed by a guy with a ponytail riding a moped so no I'm not ok."
Next Joke
"HER: Are you a dog or cat person? BRAIN:*be cool, she seems pretty great* ME: Whatever you want to eat is fine. BRAIN: *nailed it*"
"Wow. Those Spaniards are some die hard Ozzy fans.. ..cause they really went off the rails on a crazy train."
"What's black on the bottom and white on the top? Society."
"What do you call the teacher who lost her baby? Miss Carriage"
"I was told not to say the word ""Hell"" and should say something else instead... So I said, ""How about H E double dildos."""
"If you have Alzheimer's, look on the bright side... ...at least you can hide your own Easter Eggs."
"Who was the best actor in the bible ? Samson he brought the house down !"
"A pirate walks into a bar And the bartender says, ""hey, you know you have a steering wheel hanging from your zipper?"". The pirate replies,""arrr, I know, it's driving me nuts""."
"I tried to make my racing snail faster by taking off its shell But that just made it more sluggish"