202623

Joke of the Day

"I was told not to say the word ""Hell"" and should say something else instead... So I said, ""How about H E double dildos."""

"The difference between an European that feels fat and an American that feels the same? The European goes to the gym, the American goes to Jim's."

"Uncle got surgery to get 12 nipples It's not just me, it sounds super weird, dozen tit?"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To see why /r/jokes is screwing in lightbulbs"

"Why do Jewish men like to watch porno movies backwards? They like the part where the hooker gives the money back."

"What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe, dang it! BREATHE!"

"The shortest distance between two points is always closed due to some bullshit construction that should've been finished a year ago."

"Stranger danger is a very real thing. They nearly always react badly to proposals."

"What do you call an empty jar of Cheese Whiz? Cheese was."

"I went to my new male Gynecologist and he said to spread my legs so that he could numb it down there. So he went down and went numnumnumnumnumnum"