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Joke of the Day
"Itself. Itself. Itself. Itself. Itself. Itself. -History"
Next Joke
"There's nothing I've learned from being a father that I couldn't just as easily have figured out from setting all my money on fire."
"What has 72 teeth and can hold back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper."
"Today is the rest of the world's 9/11 No, seriously, look up the calendar."
"I opened the door and said ""Honey, I'm home..."", she didn't reply She just stood still in the glass jar."
"A good way to help you determine who to weed out of your life is probably by how someone pronounces ""coyote""."
"i prefer a girl without makeup. in fact i despise the artifice of flesh. give me a nice wailing skeleton"
"My sister asked me if I was gay I couldn't give her a straight answer."
"The most awkward part of meeting new people is when my kids say, ""Please help us."""
"my beloved wife was on the second earth as it detached from our earth and drifted forever #FirstWorldProblems"