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Joke of the Day

"eer booze and fun!' 'WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear."

"Don't judge me until you've scrolled a mile through my meme collection"

"I don't need a drink in my hand to be happy. I'm also happy if the drink is on a table as long as it's still within arm's reach."

"My Dad finally said that I was funny. I asked him if he loved me."

"So I was listening to some old-school French rap the other day I think the group was called the Oui-Tang Clan"

"Of all the millions and trillions of literary devices, hyperbole is my favorite."

"What do colors say when they laugh? Huehuehuehuehuehuehuehue"

"Early this morning I was sitting on the beach wondering where the sun was... then it dawned on me"

"What's the difference between a garbanzo and a chickpea? I've never had a garbanzo on my face."

"Here's a joke I've been working on: Q: What did the husband say when he returned home and found that his wife is missing?"