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Joke of the Day

"I don't need a drink in my hand to be happy. I'm also happy if the drink is on a table as long as it's still within arm's reach."

"The Irish Alligator His name was Croc O'Dile."

"Did you hear about the plane that flew over the Java Sea? it crashed."

"When I have a tough decision, I ask myself... ""What would Jesus do?"" Then, I remember how things turned out for him... And, flip a coin."

"*Writes a song for you* *Sings it under your bedroom window* *You call the cops* *Your husband falls in love with me*"

"I wonder why call them backup vocals. Was there ever a time the lead fainted and the backup took over the mic and the show went on as usual?"

"I bought 10,000,000 dogecoin yesterday. It turns out jokes are pretty profitable."

"So everyone knows, it's frowned upon to yell ""Hot potato"" when someone hands you a baby and toss it back to them"

"How does Furious 7 end? Paul Walker dies."

"What do you call an intelligent prostitute? A fucking genius!"