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Joke of the Day

"I believe, if you're in Special Ed, and you're late to class... ...it's politically incorrect to say you're tardy."

"Hey girl, I heard you like bad boys Well not to brag or anything but I'm bad at everything"

"I'm so ugly... I can't even turn on a lamp"

"When I was ten I played Secret Agent with my little brother. Turns out toddlers do not make good grappling hooks."

"Q: What do the Republicans have that Bill Clinton wishes he had? A: A mandate to govern."

"Recent documents have shown Mussolini was one of biofuels' first advocates, using them extensively in Italy, even for public transport He made the trains run on thyme"

"There's a secret evolution of Eevee I found today. If you pay your Eevee every day for at least a month, it evolves into Patreon."

"The reason I'm so happy today is because I got a penis enlarger... She's 18 years old!"

"I decided to sell my vacuum... It was just collecting dust."

"What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Wipe."