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Joke of the Day

"If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple ""Thank you"" would be nice... ...None of that ""How did you get into my house?"" business."

"What concert costs 45 cents? 50 cent featuring nickelback"

"Have you ever been to a Native American orgy? It's fucking intense man!"

"What does a tweaker and a Jehovah's Witness have in common? Both ride bicycles and are on a mission."

"Bruce Willis... Bruce Willis will probably keep making action movies. Because, you know what they say about old habits..."

"""Take Your Child to Work Day"" must be awkward at the dildo factory."

"The 3 rings of marriage The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering."

"Sorry I referred to your baby shower as a gift extortion party."

"Keep clam. I'm dyslexic."

"Seven days without a joke makes one weak."