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Joke of the Day

"A blind guy walks into the kitchen.... ...and picks up a cheese grater. Runs his fingers up and down the grater: ""who the f*ck wrote these stupid things?"""

Next Joke
 
"Hey are you a slinky? Because you're not very useful, but always bring a smile to my face when pushed down the stairs."
"Mitt Romney is walking through heaven when he runs into Barrack Obama"
"Why did the Italian miss his dinner? It'a was'a pasta his bed time"
"Yo momma so poor... that ducks throw bread at her. I fucking lost my shit at a [6]!"
"I'm considering going vegan because the steaks are too high"
"As a non-english native redditor ... Edit: grammer"
"How do you congratulate the guy who won the best tie contest? You tell him... ""that's definitely a win sir"". Or if he did ok you can say you half win sir i suppose. :/"
"Lying on a hospital bed, I pull you in close, and with my dying breath, I whisper, ""Name one of your Pokemon after me"""
"""Use divorce, Luke."" """" Obi Wan, marriage counselor"