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Joke of the Day

"My hell is a giant Bath & Body Works store ...where all the women answer yes/no questions with ""stories""."

"The Grammar Nazis burst in. ""We know you're harbouring Jews, Mrs Gies"" ""There ain't no Jews here!"" ""Double negative! Search the attic, boys"""

"What did one diabetic say to the other diabetic, on their blind date? I'm sorry, but you're just not my type."

"A little black baby dies and goes to heaven... God gives him wings. The little black baby says, ""wow God, does this mean I'm an angel?"" God replies, ""Nah nigga, you a bat""."

"When my girlfriend and I fight, I tighten the top to every jar and bottle in the house. Just so I can say ""Oh yeah, you need me NOW, huh?"""

"Justin Bieber isn't gay he just likes to get his cheekbones blown out."

"My wife threw a doughnut at my head. Now I have a glazy eye."

"Why did the baker have brown hands? Because he kneaded a poo. Better if you say this aloud."

"This sushi restaurant has the worst service ever. ""Sir, this is an aquarium."""

"I have a UPS joke Sorry it was delivered it to your landlord's off property leasing office ten miles down the road."