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Joke of the Day

"This sushi restaurant has the worst service ever. ""Sir, this is an aquarium."""

"Did you know that NASCAR fans are the easiest people to make fun of? As soon as they start chasing you down, all you have to do is turn right."

"If I ever met an exact duplicate of myself I wouldn't hang out with him. I'm too cool for that fucking nerd"

"I bought a push up bra today... It didn't work, I can still only do 2..."

"What do you call an employee at a sperm bank? A nutjob"

"Assorted s a/e x jokes Remember to always practice safe sax We don't suck we blow wet the butt, wiggle, and blow"

"What game did the dentist play when she was a child?...Caps and robbers"

"*im watching a babe on a trampoline when her boob pops out* ""whoah"" *her other boob pops out* ""WHOAH"" *a third boobs pops out* ""WHOOOAAHHHH"""

"1915-17 may have been the worst years in human history for food poisoning. 1.5 million Armenians died from bad turkey."

"Apparently its true. Apparently, someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor bastard."