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Joke of the Day

"""How did your grammar competition go?"" I losed"

"What did the cholo say when the houses fell on him? 'ey, get off me homes!"

"A violist and a cellist were standing on a sinking ship together. ""Help!"" cried the cellist ""I can't swim!"" ""Don't worry"" said the violist ""just fake it."""

"Why did the girl spray her clock? It was full of ticks."

"What do you call a black guy who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist."

"The teacher asked Simon to say his name backwards. ""No mis"" he replied"

"I overheard my wife singing in the shower. ""You should go on America's Got Talent,"" I told her. ""I can't sing,"" she replied. I said, ""Exactly."""

"Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide. Edit: spelling."

"Don't you hate when somebody gives you the finger in traffic and then you have to follow them home and loosen the lug nuts on their wheels."

"Just made up this joke: So I wrote some fan fiction, it blows."