44377

Joke of the Day

"Q: Why was Jon walking backwards on the first day of school? A: Everyone kept saying it was back to school time."

"What does a nosy pepper do? Get jalapeno business"

"The doctor said to the patient We had to remove a part of your anus Patient- will I be any different? Doctor-Just less of an asshole Edit 1- Changed rectum to anus, credit u/RigorMortis76"

"Dating tip: Don't offer to pay. It's a sign of weakness. Build trust through mutual agreement to steal. No one suspects the ""happy couple."""

"What is the best part about having Alzheimer's Making new friends every day"

"What is ISIL's favourite dessert? Terrormisu"

"My German sausage didn't come with a bun... It was just the wurst."

"Crack-head's favorite rap song... I wanna rock RIGHT NOW!!!!"

"99% of women say they don't like men who wear leather pants. Which works out perfectly, since 100% of men who wear leather pants don't like women."

"Q: How is a thief like a thermometer on a hot day? A: They are both up to something."