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Joke of the Day

"I slipped on some black ice yesterday... I thought it was regular ice until I realized my wallet was gone."

"90% of my opinions are a shrug."

"Stop saying ""11/11/11"" only happens once in a lifetime. EVERY date only happens once in a lifetime. That's how time works."

"Things I hate: lists, Oxford commas, and irony."

"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball..... .... She gagged! haha my favorite joke ever"

"If Trump replaces Obama... Orange really will be the new black."

"As a white man, I cannot celebrate Black history month, but I can celebrate Father's Day."

"Its best to put your phone on some rice when its wet Asian people will come at night and fix it"

"Why should you never trust soap? It's an emulsive lyer."

"Learning to write jokes is like when you first start having sex... You think it's easy and it's gonna make people happy but you end up just leaving people feeling confused and disappointed"