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Joke of the Day

"I'd rather have a bottle in-front-of-me ... than a frontal lobotomy."

"Killing spiders is easy and fulfilling if you imagine them whispering ""You look fat in those pants""."

"A blind man walks into a store... he then starts knocking things off the shelves. An employee asks; - ""Is there anything I can help you with?"" - ""No thanks, I'm just looking around."""

"Of course it's you. if it was me I wouldn't even bring it up."

"Did you hear the joke about german sausage? It's the wurst!"

"What's the difference between an outlaw, and an inlaw? Outlaws are wanted."

"Average people are mean ."

"Did you hear about the scarecrow who won the Nobel Peace Prize? He was out standing in his field."

"I went to go high five a shirt in my closet... ...but I left it hanging."

"You ever get off the toilet and think... Man, was I full of shit!"