43751

Joke of the Day

"How to solve issues with life expectancy The doctor has given me four months to live. I shot the doctor, The judge gave me 20 years. Problem solved"

"that show ""Intervention"" should just be called ""Haters"""

"What's the difference between light and hard? You can sleep with a light on"

"Why don't the Germans care about the word, 'nichts'? It means nothing to them."

"Cop: ""Did you kill this man?"" Me: ""No, a bullet killed him. Bullets are made of lead, which comes from the ground. The ground is part of nature. He died of natural causes. Case closed."""

"Weird how Superman's an alien but looks exactly like a white dude & then he landed in Kansas & not say, mainland China"

"Knock Knock... Horizontally Knock Knock. Who's there? Horizontally Horizontally who? Quick, The *whore is onto me* hide me from my wife."

"When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive."

"All of Donald Trump's wives are foreigners... Turns out there really are jobs American's won't do. Source: Mitt Romney's response to an interviewer's question."

"How can you tell if a black girl is pregnant? You stick a chicken wing up her vagina and it comes out clean."