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Joke of the Day

"[Pickup Line] Are you a phillips or flathead? OP: Uh, I don't know, why? YOU: I'm just trying to figure out how to screw you."

"What do you call it when gay men break up? A banana split"

"Anyone can give a definition for erectile dysfunction... It's not that hard."

"Have you ever been caught masterbating in a closet? Them: No. You: It's a really good hiding spot isn't it....."

"What do you call a Jewish Pokemon player? Ash."

"What a man How do you respond to someone who says ""fuck you"" Answer: You fuck you"

"""The best part of waking up was the Folgers in my cup"" - Suicide note, first draft"

"At my local police station, the toilet was stolen The police have nothing to go on"

"A blind prostitute is giving a guy a handjob... ...And she says ""Wow this is the biggest dick I've ever been with!"" And the guy goes ""Nah, you're just pulling my leg."""

"My friend said his baby is sooo smart but the stupid idiot can't even figure out his way home when I forget him on the bus"