4319
Joke of the Day
"There's both a McDonald's and a blood pressure machine at our Walmart. Circle of life."
Next Joke
"Santa probably regrets giving coal Santa Claus probably regrets giving coal to naughty children now that global warming is threatening his habitat."
"What did the 2 say to the 3? Do you even, bro?"
"What do people say when Batman skips Church? Christian Bale"
"How do you get a male cat ""fixed""? Get him Catstrated"
"Half way through the movie, I brought some popcorn downstairs for the kids & realized I rented the wrong Black Stallion DVD."
"Each year I get invited to go on vacation with the same group of annoying people but I can't say no because they're my husband & children."
"I'm officially putting my GPA up for adoption... I just can't raise it myself [joke credit to the girl I overheard say it in the library] Edit: apparently its from yikyak?"
"I win all of my breakups by not getting fat."
"Anything I search on the internet just shows weird porn... What is the world coming to?? [ https://explosm.net/comics/2576/ ]"