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Joke of the Day

"Why doesn't the postal worker's wife have sex with him on his day off? Because mail men don't come on Sundays."

"My thanks to Mexican Coke for sponsoring this week's weirdly tight pants. ""Mexican Coke: Porque tu pantalones deben ser dolorosos."""

"I'm throwing a party for people who can't ejaculate... Tell me if you can come."

"What do you call the angel in charge of hydroelectrics? A God dam engineer."

"Why did the Pepsi Half-Time Show suck so much? Because if it was the Coke Half-Time there would have been a hologram of Tupac or the Beetles instead of Bruno Mars."

"Did you hear the one about the chicken and the egg? They were trying to get each other off!"

"What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!"

"I bet if Jesus were here right now, he'd be like ""Toilets are amazing."""

"I paid $600 to get off once Damn court costs."

"It was recently revealed that 25% of women are being treated for mental illness. Scary shit. It means 75% are running around untreated."