42501

Joke of the Day

"Apparently, if you jump out of a plane wearing parachute pants, it doesn't break your fall at all. But you can carry about a hundred combs."

"If y is dependent upon x, that means y is determined by x. So we could call y the determinant. If that's true, then we can call x Arnold... because it's de-terminator. Heh."

"Why do Java programmers wear glasses? Because they can't C#"

"'Jesus loves you' means one thing in general society. And something completely different in prison."

"What di you call a snowman in may? A puddle!"

"You can learn a lot about your kids by helping them with their homework for example, mine are idiots."

"I married two women last week Wasn't that big o' me"

"Two cows are standing peacefully on a hill. ""Moo"", pipes up the first cow. The second cow turns to her and says ""BITCH, I WAS GONNA SAY THAT!"""

"Why didn't the guitarist get laid? Because he had bad pickups"

"""Guess What?"" ""What?"" ""Good Guess"""