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Joke of the Day

"I had a friend who used to draw on her eyebrows. One day, she accidentally drew them to high. When I told her, she looked surprised."

"""The garbage needs to go out. It's full of candy wrappers."" ""Is Eminem in there?"""

"How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Obviously more than 8, because my basement is still dark."

"What do you call a mother who is overweight and poor? Beef on WIC"

"For Canadians How do you kill a one legged fox? Make him run across the country"

"If you are going to use a boat to escape make sure its in water not in water town!"

"Two flies are sitting on a piece of shit. One fly cuts a fart. The other one says, ""Hey! I'm eatin' here!"""

"I used to be addicted to having sex with bars of soap. But then I came clean."

"Why can't rock climbing instructors get dates? Because they rappel men and women."

"What's the difference between a bull and an orchestra? The bull has the horns in front and the asshole in the back."