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Joke of the Day

"A horse walks into a Police Station. Not a joke it actually happened http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-merseyside-29550834 I would welcome a few jokes based upon this though."

"I came up with a new recipe for avocado and duck. I'm going to call it Quackamole."

"Two tomatoes were sitting in a fridge... One tomato says to the other: 'Ain't it cold?' And the other replies: 'HOOOOOLY SHIT, A SPEAKING TOMATO!!!'"

"Why doesn't a window scream when you shatter it? Because it's paneless."

"A horse walks into the bar Several people left because they realised the possible dangers of that situation."

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I live in Canada. So, free health care."

"So I bought a fragrant candle the other day, but when I lit it nothing happened... It just didn't make scents."

"Why are pistachios called pistachios? More like ""these-are-hard-to-openios"""

"Why do the French have so many civil wars? So they can win one every now and again. (Thanks, John Cleese! This was too good not to share.)"

"The female stink badger has 12 potent smelling nipples.. dozen tit make scents"