171804

Joke of the Day

"Why do the French have so many civil wars? So they can win one every now and again. (Thanks, John Cleese! This was too good not to share.)"

"Oh is it really raining outside? Please post a status update for all of us with no windows."

"SURPRISE! I scream, bursting from the vat of mashed potatoes. The other lunch ladies do not look surprised They do not look surprised at all"

"Who's got two thumbs and might be doing this police lineup wrong?"

"So all the primates got together for a male-only gathering, but they put up a sign banning humans. No homo."

"I like the song ""I want to be a billionaire"" because it's about a millionaire wanting to be 1000 times richer. Sweet."

"Every Saturday is like an episode of CSI... I have to figure out where I was, what I did, and who I did!"

"I like my coffee like I like my men... I don't like coffee. I'm very straight."

"I decided to have a can of soup for lunch today... ...And hating to see good food go to waste, I decided to have the soup as well."

"TIFU by whipping the wrong person at the BDSM club. Whoops, wrong sub."