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Joke of the Day

"My friend said a baby crying is the best form of birth control but there was a baby bawling next door all night & my girlfriend got pregnant"

"This year for Christmas, I asked for a new pair of scissors.... My old pair just wasn't cutting it!!!"

"What is the internal tmperature of a taun-taun Luke warm"

"#MyRoommateIsWeird she keeps having babies and making me take care of them. She also insists I call her 'Wife'"

"During the height of the Cold War, spies were prepared to commit suicide if caught, with the help of a tiny #weed cigarette."

"how does james bond prefer his women? shaven, not furred"

"What's brown, and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre......"

"How do painters stay warm? They add another coat."

"In other news.... We now have the most attractive First Lady since Marilyn Monroe."

"I don't know about you guys... but I don't want Trump's trickle down economics...."