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Joke of the Day

"My friend said a baby crying is the best form of birth control but there was a baby bawling next door all night & my girlfriend got pregnant"

"""Do you ever get the feeling Mitch is an undercover cop?"" [MITCH enters] MITCH: Hey guys! *speaking into shirt collar* I brought the drugs"

"David was hard at work... it was really quite awkward for his coworkers."

"How many dead prostitutes does it take to change a light bulb? More than ten because my basement is still dark."

"Why cant Schizophrenics be alcoholics? because they never drink alone."

"Why was Dr. Dre kicked out of the farmer's market? He kept dropping the beets."

"What did the Black owner of the BMW do to deserve jail? You mean, black people have to DO something to deserve jail? p.s I know I am going dowwwnn for this"

"Why arent there any Socialist entrepreneurs? Seriously I dont know....."

"No one seems to like my gallows humor. They get so hung up about it."

"A man tell his waitress he would like to order a beer When she asks what brand of beer he would like to drink he replies with, ""Root"". And dads all over the world sighed with satisfaction ."