195715

Joke of the Day

"During the height of the Cold War, spies were prepared to commit suicide if caught, with the help of a tiny #weed cigarette."

"Did you hear about the 120 pound man with the 60 pound testicles? People say he was half-nuts."

"When I die, I want to die like my Grandpa, in his sleep Not like his passengers, screaming in pain"

"How will future generations contact Beyonce's ghost? They'll hold a Beyonceance."

"Gotta love those girls in department stores wearing lab coats--taking time away from their experiments to help women out with their makeup."

"How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They'll just beat the room for being black"

"Guest: Why did you offer me a piece of candy? Hotel Clerk: You said you wanted the best suite in the hotel."

"*through a mouthful of Nutella* Oh, yeah, healfy eafing is sufer imfortant to me."

"3 blonds were driving to Disney World... The sign said; Disney World Left, so they started crying, turned around, and drove home."

"Teacher ""Hi, why are you here?"" Me ""Um, isn't this the beginners' philosophy class?"" Teacher ""Yes and you're off to a really bad start."""