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Joke of the Day
"I've even started lying about my age on the treadmill at the gym."
Next Joke
"What is the square root of 69? Ate Something! (""8 something"", actually 8.306)"
"Why did the tomato blush? Because it seen the Salad dressing ( I'll see myself out)"
"Pokemon Go Run errands with your mom."
"[Calls boss] I'm gonna be late... ""How late?"" *Cut to me trapped inside a tiny house made from Lego* I've no idea to be honest with you..."
"What is the difference between outlaws and inlaws? Outlaws are wanted."
"I wonder if Hitler ever thought... ""Crap, did I turn the oven off?"""
"You can reduce your weight by one simple exercise of shaking your head horizontally. Do it when you are offered food"
"What's the difference between a Jew and Harry Potter? One of them left the chamber alive."
"My date said he wasn't looking for anything serious like I was trying to help him solve cold case files and shit."