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Joke of the Day

"Obama won? That's it I am moving.... ..to USA!"

"These one line jokes are really something ..they put you up straight in line of fire."

"Hey ladies, No Shave November ain't for you. Just saw some gal lookin' like she was tryin' to smuggle a cactus in her yoga pants. Merica."

"9 y/o daughter: dad, what's your favourite healthy food? Me: fruits. Your's? 9: Eggs Me: Good 9: like Reese's peanut butter eggs"

"Ahhh.......I love the sounds of autumn; that old familiar crunch of Halloween candy wrappers on the floor."

"I was going to make a joke about blind people but I do not want to offend anyone on reddit."

"The doc gave me some bad news today... I was deficient in VITAMIN U."

"How do you get a one armed Italian out of a tree? You talk to him!"

"A book just fell on my head. I've only got myshelf to blame."

"Earth, Venus, Mars, and Jupiter were going to setup a party But they failed because nobody knew how to planet"