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Joke of the Day

"Hey ladies, No Shave November ain't for you. Just saw some gal lookin' like she was tryin' to smuggle a cactus in her yoga pants. Merica."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay strip club Knock! Knock! *who's there?* The chicken."

"What do you call a shifty midget in a police line up? A little suspect"

"Why are there no knock knock jokes about America? Cause' freedom rings"

"It is Canadian Thanksgiving this weekend ...and I'm just thankful that I'll have ebola turkey soup and not ebola the deadly disease."

"What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common? By the time you're finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in. "

"What time does Sean Connery go to Wimbledon? tennish"

"What is simultaneously the best and worst thing one can hear at the dentist? These are the best looking teeth I've ever come across"

"What do you call a cow in a Russian forest? A moss-cow. Alternative answer: dead."

"How did the constipated mathematician solve his problem? Simple! He just worked it out with a pencil!"