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Joke of the Day

"I was going to make a joke about blind people but I do not want to offend anyone on reddit."

"New to reddit so thought I'd start by sharing one of my favourite jokes. When is a pixie not a pixie? When he's got his head up a faeries skirt, then he's a goblin!"

"19 showed us what he has learned at college when he asked ""can we drink screwdrivers while we are opening presents?"" *making screwdrivers*"

"Why should you never date a tennis player? Love means nothing to them."

"CAMPING TIP: If you get lost in the woods, a compass can help you get lost more north."

"Most people can't drink coffee then go to sleep. I'm just the opposite. . . I can't go to sleep and then drink coffee. God, that was stupid."

"we put a man on the moon but we can't keep him there. he keeps coming back. you stay on the moon. you stay there."

"What do you get when you have two balls in your hand? A man's undivided attention!"

"My mom worries about me too much. We were having a phone conversation till she dropped her phone. She picks it up and asks ""are you OK?"""

"[interrupts pastor] but jesus was crucified today shouldn't we call today ""Bad Friday"" or even ""Kinda Messed Up They Killed Jesus Friday"""