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Joke of the Day

"I'd never lie just to get a girl to sleep with me, is one of my favorite lies to tell girls that I am trying to sleep with."

"Best place to hide stuff? Page two in Google search results!"

"A 5-year old boy approaches his father saying, ""Dad, I know the woman I want to marry."" ""Oh yeah, who is it?"" He replies, ""Grandmaw."" ""You can't marry my mother!"" ""Why not? YOU MARRIED MINE!"""

"What do you call a surfer who loves Muhammad? A radicalized Muslim braaaaaaaaaaaaaa"

"Please stop putting flyers on my windshield in parking lots. I have no desire to see your new band called ""Parking Violation""."

"Why do they refer to network ports as female? Because when they stop talking to you, you never know why."

"What advice did Tiger Woods' dad have for Tiger during training? Concentrate on golffuck everything else."

"What is a Mexican's favorite FPS? Borderlands."

"What do you call a woman standing in the middle of at tennis court? Annette!"

"If we become engaged will you give me a ring? Sure, what's your phone number?"