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Joke of the Day

"What is a Mexican's favorite FPS? Borderlands."

"What is the thing called that irrigates your lawn? A garden Jose."

"How did Donald Trump lose $916 million? Well he was handed everything in life. Have you seen his hands? Most of what he was gifted slipped right through."

"I could totally handle twins, triplets even quadruplets. Hold it, you're talking about BABIES?"

"I was in the supermarket today and the cashier asked the foreign couple in front of me if they needed help packing their bags Fuck me, we only voted out yesterday give them a chance"

"a group of kittens is called a litter because kittens are garbage"

"Why did they make the toilet paper so hard in North Korea? Because the Party wants to make every asshole Red."

"Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper ? He sold his soul to Santa."

"Ladies: Is your boyfriend the strong, silent type? Is he carved out of wood? Ladies, you may be dating a garden gnome."

"I was in a band.. called ""Missing Cat"". You might have seen our posters."