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Joke of the Day

"i'm actually pretty attractive if you never compare me to anyone ever"

"Why do melons have traditional weddings? Because they can't elope!"

"What is Donald Trump's favorite holiday? Cinco De Porto!"

"What does a Mathematician say when he eats too much pie? (-1/64)"

"What do you call a cross between a human and a monkey? A nigger."

"Did you hear about the feminist picnic? Yeah, apparently it got cancelled, no one wanted to make the sandwiches."

"Jesus: saw that facebook event ""last supper""... looks good but whys it called the ""last supper"" ? Judas: oh.. No reason really"

"I accidentally hit a little kid with my car. It wasn't serious. Nobody saw me. Anthony Jeselnik."

"Ladies, here's a secret. The moment you are happy and over us, we will send you a text saying that we miss you."

"What did the O say to the 8? Nice belt."