41098

Joke of the Day

"5: ""Mommy why not?"" Me: ""Because you're driving me crazy."" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"""

"Three men walk into a bar... One said ouch."

"What did the German brat say to his father? You're the wurst!"

"If i were a pro wrestler my finisher would be struggling to put together an IKEA chair then smashing it on the other dude in frustration"

"Went to the dog car dealership. I could tell the salespeople were friendly, since I got all the Volkswagen at me!"

"My brother and I own adjacent farms The other day he rode over to complain that I was growing marijuana on his side of the fence. I told him to get off his high horse."

"First year my husband didn't give me some sort of sweet on our anniversary. I got roses. He thinks I'm fat. I know it."

"Rumours suggest Usain Bolt has been cheating on his wife. I'm amazed she hasn't caught him. Then I remembered that he can finish in 9.58 seconds."

"What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck"

"My memory is warped and skips often You could call it phonographic"