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Joke of the Day

"in 2nd grade we had to draw what we wanted to be when we grew up and i just drew myself with sunglasses on"

"What rhymes with computer? No it doesn't..."

"Jesus can walk on water so Jesus may be able to walk on water but who cares! Stephen hawking's runs on battery's"

"What happens when you get some vinegar in your ear? You suffer from pickled hearing!"

"[climbs a Tibetan mountain for 6 days & stumbles out of breath into a Buddhist monastery] please. please tell me u have wifi"

"""You like mayonnaise? Prove it."" - Costco"

"Good cop: frisks you Bad cop: takes his time"

"You know what they say? Once you go white, you'll rob the world of it's resources and murder indigenous peoples."

"Why did everybody where white pants at The Masters? Dustin Johnson sneezed."

"I will build a great wall. To keep all the Muslims out. Yours truly, Donald trump."