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Joke of the Day
"I bought a 5 gallon drum of correction fluid the other day. Big mistake."
Next Joke
"Why does Caitlyn Jenner feel like her kids see though her? I guess she is trans parent now Edit: *through"
"*CLOP CLOP CLOP* **BANG BANG** *CLOP CLOP CLOP*. And a man died Those damn Amish pulled a drive-by"
"I seasoned my beef with too much salt I'm salty."
"Is it strange how saying sentences backwards creates backwards sentences saying how strange it is?"
"DEMON: [roars] KNEEL, MORTALIT IS I, BAELROTH THE SPOON-HIDER ME: omg what're u gonna do to me? DEMON: werewere you not listening just now"
"a golfer stabbed a Mexican the other day.... it was a hole in Juan"
"I've got one for you. Game of War. Hardcore? Maybe if you're my mom."
"I'm off to the store got your wallet? yes you sure? YES *hour later wife turns on news and I'm being chased by 6 cop cars and a helicopter*"
"what do you do if you see your ex , running around in your front yard covered in blood and screaming for help ? stay calm . reload . and try again."