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Joke of the Day

"I used to be square but then I gave my self to a higher power... Now I'm stuck in this cubical all day"

"ME: ppl call dogs ""doggo"" now. i guess its a meme, i dont get it THERAPIST: this is $200/hr. do you want to talk about anything else? ME: no"

"I shouldn't play with Legos? It says ""Ages 7 & Up"". 30 is higher than 7. Instead of calling me immature, you need to go take a math class."

"My funeral instructions to my family were to have me cremated, and I told my best friends under no circumstances should I be cremated."

"Why is Barbie not pregnant? Because Ken came in a different box."

"A photon walks into a hotel. The bellhop asks if he needs help with his bags. The photon says, ""no, I'm travelling light. """

"What do you call a murder in the middle east? A hummus-cide"

"""You miss 100% of the shots you don't take."" - Wayne Gretzky - Melania Trump"

"Racism is wrong I have never been racist before. It's wrong for anybody to be racist, it doesn't matter whether they're black, Asian, or normal."

"What do you call 100 Mexicans holding hands around your yard Spicket fence"