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Joke of the Day

"Slasher films are so unrealistic. Anyone could out run a guy walking with a chainsaw. That's why I train running with a chainsaw."

"The worst part about being stoned at work is realizing it's your day off."

"What's the difference between light and hard? You can sleep with a light on."

"What do you get in the Netherlands, when you fail your driving test three times? A yellow license plate."

"A fish swims into a wall Dam"

"What do you call a girl that gives head in the shower? Brainwashed."

"Where do graphic designers go for a drink? CGI Friday's"

"What does it mean when you're on a date and he pushes you in front of a bus?"

"Hey, guy in Prius blasting heavy metal - decide which type of annoying person you want to be."

"We're learning more about the sale of the L.A. Clippers. Insiders say it came down to a bidding war between Steve Ballmer and Oprah. I'll let you guess who Donald Sterling rooted for."