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Joke of the Day
"I dressed up for Halloween today.. I went as someone who suffers from dyslexia"
Next Joke
"It was always going to be a yes vote on gay marriage in Ireland. . . No reason to drink otherwise."
"I couldn't use my phone at the funeral It was a dead zone"
"Text from mom: How's my baby girl? Me: I'm moving back in. Mom: Your room is ready. Me: No, your uterus! Mom: Steph you drink too much"
"Why are storms always called girls names? Because when they come they are always wet and uncontrollable, and when they disappear they take or destroy all your stuff"
"Never test the depth of the water with both feet."
"What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick"
"What do you call someone who really likes balloons? Autistic."
"A man walks up to the counter at the airport. ""Can I help you?"" asks the agent. ""I want a round trip ticket"" says the man. ""Where to?"" asks the agent. ""Right back to here."""
"The Queen is what she drinks... Royalty [ I hope this isn't a repost. I thought of it on my own]"