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Joke of the Day

"It's so hot outside that I just saw two hobbits throw a ring off my roof."

"9/10 people are retarded I'm glad I'm a part of the 1%."

"Why is there a wolf in the smoke shop? He's just looking for a pack."

"[Clinic waiting room] Me: WHEN DO WE DO BUTT STUFF??! Nurse: Sir don't shout that! Me: [whispering to old lady next to me] butt stuff. when?"

"Good looks are a bonus, humour is a must."

"Hell is filled with news anchors tapping stacks of papers on desks and engaging in lighthearted end-of-broadcast banter."

"Look all I'm saying is Harry Potter could have defeated Voldemort much faster with the use of drones"

"So I was in math class when the teacher asked me what comes after 69. Apparently, ""I do."" is not the correct answer."

"Do the the fatty acids get picked on by the other acids?"

"Why are there no knock-knock jokes about freedom? because freedom rings. Happy Independence day everybody!"