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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a stoat and a weasel? One is weasily recognised and the other is stoatally different"

"GF: ...I'm pregnant ME: *holding a 10-piece chicken nuggets box that actually has 11 nuggets* I've also got some pretty big news"

"French Joke Q. What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up? A. The French Army."

"Sex is like cooking. Your girlfriend will be angry at you because you ate your neighbour's even though she hasn't cooked for you in weeks."

"In my final years of education, I lost my virginity to my teacher I was home schooled"

"New York City is the only place where sound travels faster than light. I always hear the horn before the light turns green."

"I WANT TO LIVE! Patient:""Docter, I have only 30 seconds to live!"" Doctor:""I'll be with you in a minute."""

"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? Because he was outstanding in his field"

"What do you call a sleepwalking nun? Roaming Catholic."

"Mexican jokes and black jokes are all the same. Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal."