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Joke of the Day

"*doctor moonwalks into office* ""Your test results are back Mr Johnson. You tested positive for BEING FABULOUS!!"" *Mr Johnson does the robot*"

"Why did the rooster cross the road? To show he wasn't a chicken."

"I'm so attractive Whenever I enter a room, the lights get turned on"

"I'm about to pound some meat. Sadly this is not a euphemism. Again. *sigh*"

"1-step guide for Asexual Reproduction Go fuck yourself"

"The problem with Chris Brown jokes is . . . He always beats you to the punch."

"My love for you is like a candle. If you forget about me, I will burn your fucking house down"

"I'm dyslexic, atheist and an insomniac... I stay up all night wondering if there *really* is a Dog."

"So you're the bitch that told that bitch that I'm a bitch. Well listen bitch, it takes a bitch to know a bitch. So who's the bitch now, bitch?"

"Who has more sense a woman or a wall? The wall. It knows how to keep its mouth shut, do its job, stay fuckin put!"