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Joke of the Day
"2 goats were found to have dyslexia after turning up to a toga party."
Next Joke
"What happened to the horse that ate a duracell battery? He went on furlong-er."
"ME [8:49PM]: on my way, taking a crab GF [8:50PM]: u mean a cab ME [8:52PM]: not exactly. be there in several days"
"My sex life is just like my typing skills. One handed."
"If your'e anxious and you know it..... ...clasp your hands."
"So I bought a pedometer the other day... I think it's broken. The display keeps reading ""TOO OLD""."
"How many rocks did Hank Schrader have in his collection by the end of Breaking Bad? None, they were all minerals."
"How many points do you get if you hit a golfer? Fore."
"Ladies call me the mitochondria because they kinda remember me from high school and i'm in a cell"
"My mom just put a pic on Facebook that says, ""Share if your daughter is beautiful AND smart."" She tagged my sister."