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Joke of the Day
"What do you call food between two slices of bread? a sandwich"
Next Joke
"Day 3 in the desert: I have somehow gained the respect of some birds as they are circling above me in some sort of protective formation"
"What Would Darth Hitler Say to His Son? Look, I am your Fuhrer."
"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the 'P' is silent!"
"I think the term copycat serial killer is a bullshit term. They can't kill the same people as the other guy"
"Scottish Engineers Q: What is the anthem for Scottish Engineers? A: ""All the Single Laddies"" Edit: Read it carefully"
"Sorry I pissed on the walls of your bathroom, but the flowery wall paper made me think I was outside.. Also you're out of Valium"
"What's a hipsters favorite season? Summer, they like it before it's cool"
"Mark Ruffalo is the name you could most likely teach a dog to say."
"I'm an archaeologist... My life is in ruins."