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Joke of the Day

"Whenever I start to hate my job I think about the camera crew that has to follow the Kardashian's 24/7."

"I'm just looking for a woman who is smart, funny & can drive a getaway car tomorrow morning at 8"

"I think that whenever you become a parent, doctors should just prescribe whatever pills you want."

"How many times does it take for a woman on period to change a lightbulb? IT WILL TAKE THE TIME IT FUCKING NEEDS !!!"

"What does a rock put on when it stinks? Geodorant."

"Do you know how the store Menards got its name? A pirate was kicked in the nuts and he went, ""Arr! Me-nards!"""

"I'm at an age where I don't spring into action. I dead of winter into action."

"A Newfie, a Quebecois, and a Native walk into a bar in Calgary. The bartender says ""Get the fuck out!"""

"What does toilet paper and office paper have in common? You can write on both of them with a No. 2"

"Past elections: Which candidate will most improve our country? 2016 election: Which candidate is least likely to start The Purge?"