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Joke of the Day

"How many times does it take for a woman on period to change a lightbulb? IT WILL TAKE THE TIME IT FUCKING NEEDS !!!"

"Apparently even if you delete the drunk text messages you sent last night from your phone, the other person can still see them."

"There was a vote at the offices of Microsoft whether to update a beloved software or keep it the way it was. Bill Gates decided to v2 it"

"god walks into a bar... and no one could believe it"

"I keep having this reoccurring dream Every night I dream I'm constantly changing between being a teepee and a wigwam. I went to the doctor and he told me ""Calm down kid, you're two tents.""."

"Maybe Hitler became evil because he was mad that after so many years of lifting his hand nobody high fived him."

"Break a mirror and get 7 years of bad luck... Break a condom and get 18"

"There are only a few people I can say ""You're one of the few friends I enjoy being with more in person than on Facebook."

"What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? GLOVES! Nah, just kidding. He still hasn't unwrapped his present."

"I bet Elmo wonders about how they might stop funding PBS. And sometimes why."