38160

Joke of the Day

"What is green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table. [Thanks, Wagon Train camper!]"

"What do you call a redneck girl who can run faster than her brothers? A virgin."

"How does every racist joke start? With a look over your shoulder."

"Why aren't there any 'Knock, Knock' jokes about America? 'Cuz freedom rings, baby!"

"When Miley Cyrus licks a sledgehammer naked, it's art. When I do it, I'm drunk and told to leave Home Depot."

"People who continually put the toilet paper roll in backwards are evolutionary dead-ends, like the Neanderthal."

"""I don't want a lot for Christmas."" Later... ""All I want for Christmas is you."" EXACTLY WHAT DOES THAT DO FOR MY SELF-CONFIDENCE, MARIAH."

"I requested the number 867-5309 from my cellular provider because I like being annoyed to the point of rage."

"There are 10 types of people in the world Those who understand binary, those who do not understand binary and those who did not expect this joke to be in ternary."

"I've been a vegetarian for 13 years but if I ever got the chance I would absolutely 100% bite the head off the Geico gecko"