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Joke of the Day

"I'm not bisexual. I'm ambisextrous."

"Did you know half your penis is inside you? If that's true, I'm all the way up to three inches."

"Maybe my mom was right all those years ago. Maybe I won't be happy until someone loses an eye. Maybe that's what's been missing."

"How do you make a cat go 'woof'? Douse it in gasoline and set it alight."

"When god created Adam, she said: ""I've got good news and bad news.... ...good news is, I'm giving you a penis AND a brain. Bad news is, I'm only giving you enough blood to use one at a time."""

"Why can't animals take tests? Too many cheetahs!!!!"

"Excuse me? Do you work at Little Ceasars? Cuz Ur Hot And I'm Ready."

"My best joke today is.... r/news sub count. Literally just go there and press f5"

"Hey everyone in a play pretending to drive a car - stop steering so much."

"We'd be scared of beavers if trees screamed."