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Joke of the Day

"Instead of looking for things that divide you look for things that bring you together, like the way you all look for things that divide you."

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"When taking the SAT, write ""Chuck Norris"" for every answer. You will score over 8000."
"What did the slice of pork say to the attractive woman.... ....you may be hot, but I'm bacon!!!"
"How does Bob Marley like his donuts? Preferably not dead from cancer."
"What do runners eat before a race? Nothing. They fast"
"I made a movie about freezing time I showed it to some people, but they thought it was just a picture. It's 3 hours and 27 minutes long...if you don't pause"
"Height of .... Height of Stupidity - Looking through the keyhole of a glass door.. Height of embarrassment - when you find other person looking through the other side of the same keyhole.."
"Be kind to strangers. One of them could end up being your coroner."
"Why couldn't Beethoven find his teacher? Because he was Haydn."
"If I was the last person on earth... I would be the best in everything."
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