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Joke of the Day

"Just a typical interview ""What's your greatest weakness?"" ""Honesty."" ""I don't really think that's a weakness."" ""I don't give a fuck what you think."""

"My old best friend ran off years ago to pursue his dream of becoming a mime... I haven't heard from him since."

"What do you call an Asian man with one leg? Tie Won Shoo"

"When someone asks me where I see myself in 5 years... I dunno...I don't have 2020 vision."

"Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead."

"Why is Santa's sack so large? He only comes once a year."

"No thanks, 28 yr old hitting on me at the bar... With our age difference, I wouldn't be a cougar... more like a saber-toothed tiger."

"The 2016 presidential race Nuff said."

"So my friends played a practical joke on me They gave me a candy bar & told me it was chocolate, but it was actually carob. Fucking carob terrorists!"

"What do you call a karate expert with a father who has diarrhoea? A chop happy chappy with a crap happy pappy."