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Joke of the Day

"Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead."

"Women wake up yawning and men with an erection. Coincidence? I think not."

"My gf could be a an NFL running back she will *not* go down."

"If you told Alexander Hamilton that the online lottery to see his rap musical was unavailable due to server overload, he'd be like, ""WITCH!"""

"What do you call a grandpa who couldn't understand why his email wanted to upload his attachment to share it? An old man yelling at the cloud"

"A woman turns to her husband and asks... ""Dear, how many women have you slept with?"" He replied, ""Just you dear, the other ones kept me awake."""

"The boss said I should let my creative juices flow. What he doesn't know is that my creative juices are vodka and cranberry."

"What does it look like when you microwave a baby? Not sure, I close my eyes when I masturbate"

"Racism is wrong I have never been racist before. It's wrong for anybody to be racist, it doesn't matter whether they're black, Asian, or normal."

"What do you call a bomb in a French kitchen. Linoleum blown apart."