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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the new bra they call the Sheepdog? It rounds them up and points them in the right direction."

"How do you cut a Emo sandwich? Trick question, it cuts itself."

"me: [raises hand] my date: again, that's not necessary"

"How do you keep an idiot in suspense?"

"If someone catches me staring I quickly look to my left & right so they think ""oh that girl's not looking at ME she's looking at EVERYTHING"""

"Now that gay marriage is legal in the USA OPs can finally get married!"

"A table walks into a bar and says... Drinks are on me!"

"Did you hear about the guy that ran the erectile dysfunction support group? He had to disband the group because he couldn't raise enough members."

"The new season of House of Cards will be nothing compared to what lies ahead with President Trump!"

"Oh please! Merkel: ""Alexis, I don't think you Greeks understand the seriousness of your debt situation..."" Tsipras: ""Oh please....you really should give us a bit more credit."""